39 weeks.. the last week of this pregnancy!

It's official, I am in my 39th week of pregnancy! This will be the last week I carry this baby inside my belly, if he doesn't come on his own I will be induced on the 21st. I really truly hope he decides to come out soon. For the past 3 days I have had maybe a total of 5 hours of sleep. It's impossible to get comfortable and I am in constant pain, sometimes unable to walk or get out of bed. It's getting ridiculous and to be honest, I have had enough! I've been crying off and on for the last few days because I am truly so miserable and have never felt so awful in my entire life. I want him out now! Last night I woke up at least 5 different times in less than 6 hours, and each time I had to pee at least twice.. so it's safe to say I went to the bathroom at least 10 times last night. Baby boy is sitting very very low and hitting my bladder every chance he gets. I'm tired and cranky and completely irritable and just want my son out already! I know I should be patient but it has been a very long 9 months and I am so done with this phase. I'm ready to meet my son and hold him and share those first moments with my husband.

Yes, I said with my husband :) He came back just in time. I was headed to the airport and the closer I got the more excited I became. I probably looked goofy with a huge smile on my face the whole time walking to the gate. I arrived just in time to see his plane land and I got butterflies. I saw him walking through the terminal and have never been so happy, we ran to each other and didn't let go for several minutes and I of course was trying my best not to burst into tears (tears of joy that is). It was like the first time seeing him all over again. I really can't explain those first few minutes other than it was surreal and felt like I was dreaming. Sounds corny, I know but that's really what it felt like. This morning I woke up next to my husband for the first time in many many months and I knew I wasn't dreaming. I know I'm lucky to have him home right now, there's so many ladies out there who have to have their babies without their husbands around because of deployment. Up until very recently I thought I would be in that situation but things worked out in our favor, thank God!! I was never one to take my husband for granted but now I also remember not to take little moments or big moments for granted either. He is without a doubt the love of my life and there's nobody else I'd rather share this life with. I'm just going to take in this time with him before he has to go back and make it as memorable as possible.

Hopefully the next blog post I write will be all about the baby and have a ton of pictures :)

How far along? 39 Weeks

Total weight gain: 30lbs which is about the amount an average person should gain
Maternity clothes? Pretty much that's all I wear, sadly I ripped the only pair of maternity jeans that I have, how freakin depressing?!!
Stretch marks? Yup, stomach is completely covered :(
Sleep: I've slept maybe 5hours in the past 3days, so I've kinda forgotten what sleep is
Best moment this week: Having my husband come home!! 
Miss Anything? Being comfortable and I really miss sleep and not feeling like my baby is trying to kill me
Movement: Pretty much non stop, he moves with so much force that it actually hurts pretty bad now
Food cravings: Mocha frappe from McDonalds.. seriously addicted to them

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nothing in particular

Gender: Boy!

Labor Signs: Contractions but so far they're not too close together or in a pattern.
Symptoms: Lots of pressure and sharp pain in the pelvic area, very bad sciatica on both sides, heartburn of course, Braxton-Hicks as well as contractions in my lower back.
Belly Button in or out? Definitely out!

Wedding ring on or off? Always on though it is starting to get pretty tight

Happy or Moody most of the time: Kinda sad and moody because of the pain and discomfort but I do try to be happy regardless
Looking forward to: Having this baby asap so I can feel good again and be able to see and hold my son and have my husband be here for it.

My husband and our puppy cuddling, she really missed him and was so happy to see him again

39 Weeks.. seriously ready to burst, never been so uncomfortable in my life



36 Weeks

On Saturday my baby will be considered full term.. Finally getting there! According to some charts I've looked at my little melon baby should be just under 6lbs, well two weeks ago he was 6lbs so I'm going to assume he's at least 7lbs by now. My belly is getting pretty huge and in the past two weeks I've gone from not having any stretch marks at all to having my belly pretty much covered in them.. not fun at all and really depressing because nothing will get rid of them and they are only going to look worse after I have the baby because I'll also have flabby skin. Oh well, I may not ever be able to wear a two piece bathing suit ever again but I will have a precious baby boy. I'll just have to workout hard core and eat really healthy.. highly doubt it will be easy but we will see. Gives me a good idea for a new blog post when I'm able to start working out again, I'll have to document the adventures of trying to be a hot mom.. or at least a healthy one. Hey, a girl can dream! lol. I'm gonna try my best to get in good shape before my husband comes home from deployment, I will only have a couple of months to do it so I know I will have to work really hard. One thing at a time though, first I have to give birth and make sure my son is healthy and learn to take care of him on my own before looking good can even be an issue.

 I am so nervous about how big he is already, I was told that if I go to 40 weeks he could easily weigh 10 lbs! Sorry but that is just too large, especially for my first. I can't even imagine having a baby that big! But there are women out there who are tiny and have given birth to babies bigger than that, so I know it's possible. I've heard giving birth is comparable to squeezing a Buick through a cheerio. lol.. funny but also scary! Last week I had some maternity pictures done by Stephanie Ker from Blush Artistic Photography.. so far I am really loving how they are turning out and can't wait to see them all. She really captured everything nicely. It's great because Adam can get a better idea of what I actually look like with this huge belly, the last time he saw me in person I weighed 30lbs less than I do now and there is only so much he can see over Skype and in pictures I've taken of myself so it was really nice to have some professional pictures done. He has really enjoyed looking at them so far and can't wait to see the rest of them. There are two of my favorites at the bottom of the page :)

So yesterday my dad took me grocery shopping, yes I'm to the point that I need help getting groceries lol.. Well I'm not a doctor but it's safe to say baby boy has dropped or is very close to dropping into position. I can barely walk and can feel his head really low plus there is a TON of pressure down low with some pain, there was a point while getting groceries I seriously thought I was going to have him right there.. of course my dad asked if I was ok and I said yes, so then he started making jokes about me having a baby in Meijer and then when we were pulling up to my apartment told me to get out of his truck before my water broke lol.. of course he was kidding, I think ;) I've been having contractions since I was only 18 weeks but so far they haven't been in a pattern or anything, the closest they've been was 10 minutes apart and that was about a week ago however they stopped within an hour so I didn't bother going to the hospital. This past week and a half though I've started getting contractions in my lower back, a very odd feeling but I think it's a hint that I will be going into real labor very soon. I'm predicting in the next two or three weeks..

How far along? 36 Weeks, 4 days

Total weight gain: 30lbs.. I'm pretty sure I outweigh my husband now, kinda scary! lol

Maternity clothes? Everything except for sweatpants, which are stretchy enough anyway ;)

Stretch marks? Yes, way more than I thought I would get.. Hoping they don't get worse!!

Sleep: I either sleep for only 2hrs or 12hrs, my body can't seem to find a balance.

Best moment this week: Getting a really sweet email from my husband about how excited he is to be a dad and how much he loves and misses me and how happy he will be when he's finally home :)  

Miss Anything? More than anything right now, I really miss my husband.. other than that I miss what it feels like to actually feel good and healthy.

Movement: Of course, especially just after I eat or when I'm trying to sleep. He can get pretty violent sometimes!

Food cravings: Any kind of dessert.. which isn't helping my weight at all lol.

Anything making you queasy or sick: Not really.

Gender: Boy!

Labor Signs: Contractions but so far they're not too close together or in a pattern.

Symptoms: Lots of pressure in the pelvic area, very bad sciatica on both sides, heartburn of course, Braxton-Hicks as well as contractions in my lower back.

Belly Button in or out? Definitely out!

Wedding ring on or off? Always on! (which is more than I can say for Adam, lol long story but he has lost his wedding ring for the 3rd time since being deployed.. sorry honey but I had to call you out on this. kisses!)

Happy or Moody most of the time: Usually happy, a little sad here and there but rarely ever moody. Very anxious too! 

Looking forward to: My doctor appointment on Friday, maybe they will be able to tell me for sure he has dropped down and give me a good estimate as to how much he weighs now and hopefully we can discuss getting induced before my due date because he's so big.

 

Thanks to Stephanie Ker from Blush Artistic Photography! By the way, this picture totally made me realize I seriously need to get my hair touched up LOL no worries people, I have an appointment this weekend to fix those roots ;) Also those tiny little shoes are from Adams mom, how cute are they?!

Here is another gorgeous picture by Stephanie Ker. She does excellent work! Love this one of course, it was taken on the Tridge the day before Thanksgiving, I was surprised at how gorgeous the weather turned out to be.. sunny and warm at the end of November?? Yup :)

Well now that you've seen the pretty pictures, here is one I took this morning. You can see my stretch marks or as many mamas like to call them "tiger stripes" I just wanted people to get an idea of just how big my belly is right now and you may be able to notice the bottom of my belly is looking much bigger than it has in the previous weeks. I feel like I am stretched to my limit, I've said that every week for the past two months lol yet somehow I just keep getting bigger and bigger!

 

 

 

 

35 weeks

So it's been about a month since my last post.. sorry, been super busy! Last weekend I had my baby showers, one with Adam's side of the family and the other with my side. I was exhausted the whole time but was super happy to get a bunch of great things for the baby. Been in a nesting phase so it was nice to have things to put together and really start getting the apartment ready for my little munchkin! Still have a few things to finish up but I feel like I'm finally making some progress and won't be totally unprepared if baby boy decides to come a little early. At my last appointment I was told he is in the correct position to be born.. I prefer it if he stays in a few more weeks though! I feel like it could be very soon, there is just so much pressure lately and my hips have been extra sore. It's crazy to think that at some time in the next few weeks I will officially be a mama, sometimes it doesn't seem real at all and other times it's overwhelming. I'm nervous and scared but also excited!

Now that my pregnancy is almost over, I've realized just how much time has passed since my husband has been deployed. He has pretty much missed out on the whole experience, afterall he left when I was just a few weeks along and was never able to go to any doctors appointments or see any ultrasounds except for the pictures I sent him. I tried to keep him as involved as possible, I just hope it has been enough. I know his mind is busy with the things he's doing over there and doesn't always have the time to be focused on what's going on back home so I do have a little bit of a fear that they might not have a very good bond and obviously I want them to be close. Of course Adam will love our son, I do not doubt that for a minute. I guess I'll just have to wait and see how it all plays out once Adam gets to finally hold him for the first time.. I can't even count how many times I've smiled just thinking about that moment and how happy we will be when it finally happens. Seeing them together will totally melt my heart! Hoping that he will be able to come home to see our son when he is born, I'm keeping my fingers crossed. It would be so wonderful to have him here for this precious/ life altering event.. not to mention I'd get to squeeze his hand really hard during labor and make him give me a back massage ;)

Since my last blog post I've had several doctor appointments. Well, two appointments ago my doctor was concerned because I was measuring several weeks ahead so she wanted me to get an ultrasound done just to double check everything. Turns out everything looks fine for now, I'm just going to have a really big baby! I'm glad things are looking healthy but at the same time totally scared of having a huge baby.. giving birth will be painful enough, having a larger baby isn't going to help with that either. LOL.. didn't think I wanted an epidural but with that information I will probably want one now ;) Last week he weighed approximately 6lbs already and is in the 75th percentile, meaning out of 100 babies he is bigger than 74 of them! I shouldn't be surprised though because his daddy was almost 9lbs and was several weeks early, and I was 5lbs 6oz and I was premature and also am a twin so we were both bigger babies. I have an appointment next week and then begins the weekly appointments, which really tells me I'm super close to meeting my son. Like I said earlier, totally nervous and scared but so excited as well.. There were so many times that it felt like my pregnancy was never going to end but looking back now I can't believe I'm about to be in my 9th month, it really has gone by faster than I thought. Not much longer now...

How far along? 35 Weeks, 5 days

Total weight gain: 25lbs, crazy that I've gained most of that just in the last 2 months.. thankfully I'm carrying it mostly in my belly ;)

Maternity clothes? Pretty much everything I wear right now is maternity or at least super stretchy 

Stretch marks? Sadly yes, just started getting them a little over a week ago.. it's ok as much as I don't like them I know they will eventually fade and at least it's for a good reason

Sleep: My sleeping pattern is so outta whack. Can't seem to sleep more than a couple hours at a time.

Best moment this week: My baby showers, they turned out great. Yummy food and lot's of wonderful things for my baby boy, was glad to see family I haven't seen in awhile too 

Miss Anything? Being able to breathe easily, not having heartburn 24/7, being able to walk without extreme pain.. ya know the usual lol.. also, my husband as always!

Movement: Oh yes, especially when I eat or try to sleep.. this boy is a wild one!

Food cravings: Really been loving the mocha frappes from McDonalds

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nothing in particular, though I have been more nauseated lately than usual, not as bad as the first trimester though- thank God!

Gender: Boy

Labor Signs: Started getting a few contractions in my back but it's not true labor yet

Symptoms: Lots of pressure in the pelvic area, very bad sciatica on both sides, heartburn of course, just started getting some lower back pain recently and am still getting Braxton-Hicks

Belly Button in or out? Totally out, kinda gross lol

Wedding ring on or off? Always on!

Happy or Moody most of the time: Mostly happy, the only time I'm grumpy is if I'm having contractions but usually I'm feeling too exhausted to really be moody 

 

 

Looking forward to: Hopefully getting some maternity pics taken today and Thanksgiving is tomorrow! I get to eat some great food and visit with family, who doesn't love that?!

 

 

 

 

profile of our son, and yes he is still very much a boy- the doc double checked lol

getting ready for my first baby shower, looking pretty dang big

 

at my other baby shower, not only looking big but feeling it too! lol

 

 

31 Weeks

I have been so busy for the past two months that I've totally forgotten to update my blog.. oops! Well first things first, last Saturday I started my 31st week so in just a few more days I'll be 32 weeks and in my 8th month! Feels a little surreal saying 8 months, it's hard to believe that I am finally so close to having our baby. There are times when I feel like this has flown by and other times I feel like its totally dragging and is never going to end. I know that it will end though, not much longer at all and I will finally be able to hold this little baby that has been growing in my belly.

Earlier this month my twin sister married the guy she's been with for over 5 years. I had the pleasure of being Matron of Honor! woot woot.. though I will say my toast to the couple got a little goofed up when I forgot half of my speech, but it worked out. The ceremony and reception turned out very nice and my sister looked gorgeous! It was good getting to catch up with everyone especially family and friends that I haven't seen in months or years. Everybody asked me the same questions though, I know they asked because they care and wanted to know how things were but after a hundred times in a couple of hours of the same questions I was getting tired. Mostly questions about Adam, where he was, what he's doing over there, when he will be home and if he can come back for the birth of the baby. Truth is I can't fully answer any of those questions. It sucked being reminded every time I talked to somebody that my husband wasn't there. As happy as I was for my sister and her new hubby and to be around family and friends, I couldn't help but be a little sad. The other half of my heart was missing and of course several of "our" songs were played which made me smile. One of the cute things he used to do was randomly play one of our songs and dance with me in the living room. I definitely miss that and hearing those songs at the wedding made me miss it even more. All in all though it was a good time and I must say I rocked a pair of high heels and everybody was surprised.. well folks just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean I always have to sacrifice glamour! Though you can bet your sweet butt that I kicked those heels off as soon as we got into the reception.. hehe ;)

I've noticed this past month I have become extremely emotional.. to the point that it's pretty pathetic actually but I can't even help it most of the time! I could cry over a damn commercial or a story on facebook, how sad is that?! Maybe normal for some people but I'm usually not an emotional person whatsoever so the fact that I can cry at the drop of a hat lately is quite frustrating but also funny in a way. I think every single time I get done talking to Adam I burst into tears. Obviously I love him and miss him more than words can describe but it's not different than it was a few months ago so I don't know why I'm so upset lately, I'm just going to chalk it up to hormones! On a good note, I went with my mother in law to register at Babies-R-Us and Target for the baby :) It literally took all day, I was expecting to get it done in like 2 or 3 hrs tops but it was more like 6hrs.. granted we had to make a longer drive to get to Babies R Us and we also stopped for lunch, but still.. 6hrs?! Also on a good note, I've finally got dates set for my baby showers. The one for Adams side of the family will be the 17th of November and the one for my side of the family will be on the 18th, getting invitations sent out this week and I hope to see everyone there!

How far along? 31 weeks
Total weight gain: a whopping 18lbs!! gained it all in the past two months and I don't know how lol
Maternity clothes? pretty much all of my shirts and a couple pants, going to have to get more pants though
Stretch marks? not yet
Sleep: I can only sleep for a few hours at a time, it's like my body won't let me get a lot of sleep at once.. I have been taking a ton of naps though, feels like I can't get enough sleep
Best moment this week: going to my mother in laws and watching Magic Mike
Miss Anything? other than my husband, I miss being able to sleep on my stomach and I miss not being in pain 24/7
Movement: all the time, usually he is most active when I'm trying to sleep
Food cravings: a nice bloody steak with some A1 sauce would be fantastic, and an ice cold beer.. I will finally have those things in just a couple months! ;)
Anything making you queasy or sick: Not anything in particular though I have been feeling nauseated for the past few days, not sure why
Gender: BOY!!
Labor Signs: Not really labor signs but I still have bad Braxton-Hicks
Symptoms: Heartburn everyday & feeling like my hips are going to break
Belly Button in or out? its flat, kinda sticking out.. idk but it looks weird lol
Wedding rings on or off? On
Happy or Moody most of the time: Usually never grumpy but have been very emotional
Looking forward to: my baby showers next month

showing off my belly in my bridesmaid dress just before my sisters wedding

as I announced earlier on FB, our sweet little baby is a boy!!

One of the more recent pictures, you can see how huge my belly is finally getting :)

23 Weeks

It may or may not have been a month since my last post.. ok, it's definitely been a month because I am now 23 weeks today and officially in my 6th month!! Soon I will be in my third trimester, that's so crazy and exciting for me, I think my husband is excited to. It feels like just a few weeks ago I was pacing back and forth in our apartment in Tennessee waiting for the test to say "Pregnant" or "Not Pregnant" so the fact that we are more than halfway through is amazing.

Updates since my last post: I had the 20wk ultrasound. It was hard to see the baby as well as I could the last time I had an ultrasound because there is less room for the baby and he or she was moving a lot! At one point the baby started kicking me, then stopped and crossed its feet.. it was pretty funny to watch. After all of the required photos for the doctors, I was able to get a few pictures for Adam and I. The lady asked if I wanted to know the gender, I said yes but I'd like it written down on a piece of paper so I can skype with my husband who is deployed and let him read it so we could find out together. I was still getting the ultrasound done when Adam kept trying to call me through skype but I wasn't allowed to answer it, I thought it was funny though because he called like 10 times. Finally I got home and skyped him right away. I opened the letter and showed it to him first.. he looked at it funny then I realized it was upside down lol so I turned it the right way and we both smiled and laughed and were/are so happy! I will never forget the look on his face, he was just lit right up and so excited. That was the first time I had seen him look really happy the whole time he's been deployed.

So a few days ago I had a doctors appointment, no big deal just the usual monthly checkup and to follow up with the ultrasound.. so I thought. Well I was shocked to learn that I have a fibroid on my uterus. A fibroid is a non cancerous tumor. My doctor acted like it was no big deal and didn't really bother to explain it and I was still shocked that I forgot to ask questions. I had NO clue. The only thing I knew is that there is now a higher chance of me going into labor early and that I have to be careful and really pay attention to any signs of labor or any kind of pain. I'm already at a higher risk for preterm labor so that worries me. It wasn't there just a few months ago so how did it happen so fast? If you know me well then you know that my mother died from a tumor, a brain tumor. I remained calm while the doctor went on to mumble something about getting a sugar test next month, but the word 'tumor' was making me panick on the inside. As I was driving home I started sobbing harder than I've cried in a very long time. I was also upset because usually my doctor appointments take half an hour, maybe 45 minutes tops but they were running behind so I was there for 2 hours! I was furious, I missed my husbands calls/messages because there was no service in the building and to top it off with finding out I have a tumor.. let's just say I had a meltdown for a good hour or two once I got home. THANKFULLY my husband got online one last time before going to bed to see if I was on and we were able to talk. He calmed me down and we looked more into my condition and found out it's really not as dangerous as I had thought it to be and that more than likely I and the baby will be just fine. There is nothing they can do about it while I am pregnant, it's something that will have to wait awhile after I give birth. It's amazing how I can have an awful day and be a total mess yet two minutes talking to my husband and I feel just fine again. I love that even from thousands of miles away he can somehow find the right things to say and always knows how to make me feel better. I can't wait for him to be home and for our family to be together again. He really is the love of my life.

How far along? 23 weeks
Total weight gain: nothing, somehow I weigh the exact same
Maternity clothes? just a few things for now
Stretch marks? nope
Sleep: I sleep for about 2 hours then I'm up wide awake, and by the time I'm tired again its 6am. Stinks!
Best moment this week: When I was having the worst day ever and my husband was able to skype me and cheer me up :)  
Miss Anything? Not having aches and pains everyday, being able to eat anything I wanted without having to really worry about it
Movement: All the time, especially at 2am and 5:30pm is when there is the most movement.. dinner time and sleepy time lol
Food cravings: Chicken, Mac n cheese and potatos.. any comfort food really!
Anything making you queasy or sick: Not anything unusual 
Gender: Keeping it a secret for a little while longer :)
Labor Signs: Just some good ol Braxton-Hicks
Symptoms: Heartburn everyday & feeling like the bones and muscles in my body and being destroyed
Belly Button in or out? In.. though it does look like its starting to change, I really hope it doesn't stick out lol
Wedding rings on or off? On
Happy or Moody most of the time: Usually happy but I have been getting annoyed very easily lately and I have seem to have lost my "filter" so it's been hard for me to be nice to certain people! But I honestly don't care :)
Looking forward to: Hopefully getting my babyshower planned out soon

  

My sweet baby, can't wait to meet you in just a few months!! <3

Me trying on a sweater-dress I bought for this fall/winter, thankfully it's a little stretchy ;)

18 weeks

Alrighty folks so I'm officially in my 5th month! It makes me so excited to be able to say that considering I can remember when I first found out we were expecting and I was only 3 1/2 weeks along.. time has gone by so much faster than I realized. I still feel like December is so far away but I'm sure it will go by quickly. The days are slow but usually the weeks go by fast and before I know it a month has gone by.

I assumed that by the time I was 5 months pregnant I would look it but that's not the case. Sure, I look bigger than I used to but honestly I just look a little bloated. People say that its a good thing, which I suppose it is but I'm actually at the point in pregnancy that I wouldn't mind having a belly. I've heard a lot of women that don't really show until later usually end up ballooning right out at the end of the second trimester, I was hoping it would be more gradual but it's not like its really my choice lol. The only time I really look pregnant is right after I eat because then I really am bloated and it poofs out the little bit of belly that I have.

I have a doctor appointment in a few days which is good, though the last few appointments I've been to they really didn't do anything just took my vitals and listened to the babies heartbeat. I told them how I had been getting dizzy and bad headaches so they took my blood pressure again but I guess it was fine so they aren't too worried. I'm still waiting to hear back on my echocardiogram and heart monitor results from over 2 weeks ago, hopefully that all turns out to be just fine and it should considering they never called to tell me. Usually they won't call unless there is something wrong, but then again I didn't find out for 3 weeks that I had a bladder infection.. good thing it didn't turn into a kidney infection! Yes I probably sound a little paranoid lately with health issues but hello I am carrying an unborn child inside, I think I have the right to be paranoid about my health. I will also say UTI's can also cause early contractions, so I do have a legitimate concern. I still haven't been retested to make sure it's gone and that was over a month ago, I will definitely have to ask my doctor about that at my appointment.

So Adam has been gone for several months now. Some days it doesn't seem like its been that long, and other days it feels like its been so much longer. I'm starting to get things around to send to him in a care package, he doesn't really need a whole lot but I'm sending him some things he asked for and a few extra things to make his time over there a little more tolerable. He loves my banana bread so I was trying to think of how to make it so it would last the 7-10 days it takes to get over there. I figured an air vacuum bag or container would work but then one of the other EOD wives suggested baking it in a mason jar. I've heard of cakes and brownies in a jar but never realized I could use it for banana bread too. I will probably make one for myself first to test it out (I'm sure it will be great, I just want an excuse to eat it ;)) There is a "Banana Nut Bread Baked in a Jar" recipe on allrecipes.com I plan on using, though my own recipe is great.. maybe I'll make one of each and see which one he prefers.

How far along? 18 weeks
Total weight gain: none
Maternity clothes? just a few things for now 
Stretch marks? not yet really
Sleep: some nights i sleep great, other nights i dont sleep at all
Best moment this week: my friend kara finally being back in michigan after 2yrs in korea! 
Miss Anything? adam and deli meat sandwiches lol, and not having my back ache everytime i wake up
Movement: every day now especially when i'm laying down and when i talk to adam, its like our baby somehow knows when we're talking lol
Food cravings: bagels w strawberry cream cheese, chips & salsa
Anything making you queasy or sick: the smell of my dogs food, i gag everytime i have to feed her
Gender: not sure yet, though i did have a dream it was a boy
Labor Signs: No
Symptoms: heartburn from hell, body aches all over
Belly Button in or out? in
Wedding rings on or off? on
Happy or Moody most of the time: not usually moody at all, mostly happy with a few sad emotional moments
Looking forward to: getting the ultrasound and hopefully finding out the gender august 3rd

Haven't had a picture of my belly in awhile.. not much of a belly yet but it's getting there <3

17 Weeks

In one week I will be starting my 5th month of pregnancy! It feels like it's taking forever to get to December but then I look back at how much time has already passed and I don't feel so bad. I'm just a very impatient person and can't wait to finally meet my little bundle of joy and hopefully my husband will be able to come home to see our baby on it's "birthday". It hasn't been easy since Adam has been gone but I'm doing alright. I have my bad days and I have my REALLY bad days but I'm a tough cookie and can handle it. Even though Adam doesn't really like that he's in a shit hole country away from his family and friends, he's doing really good and making the best out of it.

On Saturday I started my 17th week, and I still have like 160 days to go. My belly is slowly getting bigger but nobody around me seems to really notice it. A few weeks ago I began to experience this horrible pain across my belly and on my sides. That is the wonderful condition known as Round Ligament Pain.. basically it feels as if your muscles in your torso are being ripped apart. Also all of my organs are starting to really get squished together and pushed up and I feel so bloated now. Gotta make room for the baby somehow right? I always liked the quote "Pregnancy is the sacrifice of ones body to make life for another" it really is a sacrifice, there are sooo many horrible things about pregnancy that I never even knew about until recently but no matter what it's worth it and that's something every pregnant woman has to keep reminding themselves. The end goal is always to have an uncomplicated delivery and a healthy baby. I'm still trying to get used to the changes my body is making and even though there are days when it makes me depressed to look in the mirror, I know it will be worth it come December. There's not much I can do now so it will just have to wait until after the baby is born. I am however going to start pregnant yoga and also water aerobics to help stretch out my back muscles because my body just aches lately and it would help to have some sort of exercise even if it doesn't get me in shape at least it will help to prevent me from getting too big and uncomfortable. Also I forgot to mention, last week I started getting this weird feeling in my lower abdomen.. almost like a flutter or a muscle twitch, turns out it's my baby moving around! It's awesome, I don't feel it all the time but it's happening more and more lately which is great :)

During a deployment (or any life changing situation) you have two choices, grow or regress. I'm choosing to grow, and I don't just mean my belly ;) It doesn't come easy and it doesn't happen over night. I've recently began to get back into photography. It's just one of those things I've always loved doing and it makes me feel good to do something for other people too. You cannot let change bother you for too long especially if it is something that you have no control over, you just have to accept it for what it is and go with it. I'm doing my best to feel good and be happy, not just for myself but for my unborn baby and my husband. When he knows I am doing well it makes him feel better, and vice versa. We've been lucky enough to get to talk almost everyday, even if it's only enough time to say "I miss you and I love you." I never take that 30 second call for granted because I know women who have to go through months at a time without a single word from their husbands. There are times when there is no communication and the waiting is just torture, especially when you see something bad happen on the news. Being married to a soldier is hard, it's even harder in times when the world seems to hate America and most Americans don't even have enough respect for the troops or their families. If you have a problem with the way the war is going, discuss it with the president don't take it out on the troops, they don't make orders they just follow them. As the saying goes, if you can't stand behind them feel free to stand in front of them and remember, my husband deployed so yours doesn't have to. For those of you that are appreciative of the military and the sacrifices not only they make but their families make, thank you! Seriously, it's rare to hear good things anymore.

The next few months should be super busy for me, which is great because being busy is better than being stuck at home bored out of my mind! Next month I have an ultrasound and should be able to find out the gender by then. Also I think I want to schedule a 3D/4D ultrasound next month or sometime in September, they are a little expensive but I think they are worth it. September also brings back three of my favorite TV shows: Sons of Anarchy, Boardwalk Empire, and Dexter. Might not sound exciting but they are excellent shows that my husband would normally watch with me, at least I will have those shows to look forward to when nothing else is going on. Also I believe my babyshower will be held sometime in September, a little earlier than I had originally expected but that's just fine! My sister is getting married in October and I am the maid of honor :) Just got my dress and had to get it 2 sizes larger to be sure it will fit my belly by then (I'll be 7 months prego) and I'm also looking forward to Halloween. Not sure if I will even have plans for it this year but normally I love to dress up, it's always been a fun holiday for us! Our first Halloween as a couple we were in Florida and carved a pumpkin and bought a ton of candy because we were sure we would have a bunch of trick or treaters since we lived in an apartment complex that had many families.. sure enough nobody showed up so we ate 4 bags of candy to ourselves lol. Last year was much better, we were in Hawaii and I dressed up as a cop and he as Hannibal Lector and bar hopped through Waikiki with some friends. Definitely better than sitting at home filling our faces with chocolate lol. Anyway I think I'm rambling on about random things now..

How far along? 17 weeks
Total weight gain: I weigh the same as I did before getting pregnant, not sure how lol
Maternity clothes? Anything loose fitting or stretchy is awesome right now 
Stretch marks? Not really
Sleep: Some nights I get plenty of rest, but lately I feel like I can't get enough sleep
Best moment this week: Feeling the baby move around and being able to let Adam hear the heartbeat :)
Miss Anything? Being able to eat a deli meat sandwich without having to heat it up first (so I don't even bother with lunch meat anymore lol) and as usual, my husband!
Movement: Can't feel it everyday but it's definitely more noticeable this week than last week
Food cravings: Ice Cream!!
Anything making you queasy or sick: Nothing unusal
Gender: Not sure yet
Labor Signs: No
Symptoms: Heartburn, Round Ligament Pain.. I think that's it for now lol
Belly Button in or out? In
Wedding rings on or off? On
Happy or Moody most of the time: Almost always happy, as long as you're not an idiot ;)
Looking forward to: Getting my ultrasound and finding out the gender in a few weeks!!

My hubby dancing and singing to "What is Love" (Baby Don't Hurt Me) by Haddaway. I love that he always does his best to make me laugh, even from thousands of miles away <3